General Discussions

My dear friend Kendall Evans lived the later part of her life as an openly transwoman. One of Kendall’s favorite stories was about when she decided to present herself as a woman to the men in domestic violence intervention groups she facilitated. On that day, Kendall put on one of her favorite dre

https://youtu.be/aprXwC-5BEQ

Wisdom is nothing but a preparation of the soul, a capacity, a secret art of thinking, feeling and breathing thoughts of unity at every moment of life. ~ Herman Hesse For the past nine years, I’ve been thinking about the impact of Adverse Childhood Experiences. In 2010, I wrote about the ACE Stu

It happened in a men’s group I was facilitating. A passionate intern got frustrated with a group member and blurted out, “Battering is a choice...a simple choice. It is not hard to make another choice. People can simply choose to stop battering!” At that point, most of the men in the group mentally

Everyone has a personal narrative. I am a white, cisgender, middle class woman who went to schools and lived in neighborhoods filled with students and people similar to myself. My education is in counseling, and I spent much of my career working in child welfare. About four years ago, I shif

By Peter Pollard During my 30 years working with boys and men who have experienced trauma and violence, one of the biggest challenges I’ve encountered to providing healing resources is a near-universal reluctance among providers, policy-makers, child welfare and justice systems (and, yes, among mos

The Dominant Narrative By Rev. Keisha Kogan A few days ago my 11-year-old son came to me to tell me about his day. It was a normal sixth grade day until he got to Current Events. Current Events is when the entire sixth grade meets with the school’s principal to discuss a topic presently in the media

Hi James. Reading the first portions of your book Wheeling to Healing is creating an opening in me. As you know, I recently attended a Nonviolent Communication Class founded on the work of Marshall Rosenberg. I have been learning that feelings point to needs, needs either being met or unmet. Feeli

We are the WHEELS: Where the Rubber Meets the Road By James Encinas WHO WE ARE: As sowers of positive change in service to the dignity of all people, we are united in the belief that fear must not prevent the speaking of truth. On April 12, 2014 I got on a bicycle and hit the pavement for my

The new story of my life is neither new or a story. It’s truth. In the shape of my new days I’m now filled with easy love where my labored lungs are able to exhale without effort. I’m singing the song of play, and joy, and bounty. The story of my life is not a script that needs to change. I’m d

By Rev. Garrett A. Foster The recent movie, “Boy Erased,” is based on the true story of Jared Eeamons, the son of a small-town Baptist pastor. Jared was forced to enter a conversion therapy program. Sometimes known as “reparative therapy,” these programs are designed to change people from gay to st

Fathers are important in children’s lives. They bring different values and perspectives to the parenting partnership. In my experience with counseling families, the value of fathers is sometimes overlooked or dismissed—even by fathers themselves. Our society seems to be moving beyond thinking of m

By Mary L. Holden It was an honor to be connected to James Encinas through Jane Stevens and her ACEs Connection network. For nearly five years, we’ve worked on our separate-but-equal personal missions to spread the importance of the ACE Study completed by Vincent J. Felitti, M.D. and Robert Anda,