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Battering Behavior is a Choice, But...
In Opening the Narrative
Dana Brown
Apr 14, 2019
Thank you, Steve, for your poignant, and powerful post. And thank you, James, for your thoughtful, reflective response. With myriad experiences in my lifetime of growing up in domestic violence, and my children being raised with domestic violence, so much of what both of you shared resonated deeply. Reflecting back on the journey of not feeling safe, NOT being safe, and striving to create safety for my children, the vulnerability and raw wounds of my soul permeated through with my choices, and actions thereof. With such a profoundly deeper understanding now through learning about the ACE study in 2006, the resilience research in the last few years, and the magnitude of just one caring, supportive adult in my life, my heart and soul is continually uplifted with hope, and on-going healing. I've come to fully believe that "hurt people can heal people". My healing journey will be life-long, and although still triggered on occasion, the vast coping, and self-regulatory tools in my toolbox which build my life are easily accessible, and readily available (mindfulness, meditation, intentional breathing, nature, music, dance, etc.) Thank you too, James, for sharing Tia Martinez and colleagues research study on the cycle of domestic violence. It certainly rang true for my life. Although I wasn't the one to "break the cycle", I've dedicated my motherhood to supporting my daugher's healing journeys that they will "break the cycle". Please know too I posted the Blue Cross research onto our home page of ACEs Connection, Parenting with ACEs and California ACEs Action. Many, many blessings to each of you... With humble gratitude, Dana
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Dana Brown
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